Now Entering the State of Insanity: 2009

Joshua is ten years old today. He is officially in that hard to define area between childhood and teenager. I know him so well, yet somehow I wonder if I really know him at all. I can pick out exactly the perfect gifts for him, I know just how to prepare his lunch, I could spot a piece of clothing he would like out of a rack of a hundred he'd hate. But, still, he is changing.

Today I presented him with a large pin to wear to play practice declaring "Today is my birthday!" in bold letters. Yes, I know, many kids would rather be caught dead than wear such a thing in public, but not Joshie. He loves attention, he adores feeling special and having others compliment and single him out. And yet. Tonight he didn't want to wear it. Oh, he would have worn it, because he's still my Joshie, who never wants to hurt my feelings. But I could see in his eyes that he didn't want to wear it. Not one bit. So I told him he didn't have to, and he gratefully tore it off, grinning as he waved and ran off with his brother. My Joshie is changing.

Yes, it was just a pin, but there are so many other little things, all pointing to the undeniable truth that my Joshua, MY Joshua, is growing up. And I have to wonder, how much longer will he sit and talk with me on the couch about everything and nothing, about Bionicles and theology and all in between? How much longer will he love me with that unconditional devotion and unquestioning loyalty? When will the talks turn to fights, the eyes turn downward and away, the hat fall lower until I can't even see his sweet face anymore?

I will lose him. For a time. I have to accept this. I have to hope and pray that someday I will get him back. With wife and kids in tow, most likely. He is such a treasure, I am sure he will make someone an amazing husband and Dad.

But I am getting ahead of myself. Today, he only turned ten. And he looked at me, right in the eyes, to thank me for the great birthday presents, hat cocked askew on his forehead, lopsided grin on his still-boyish face. Then he hugged me. And, I admit, today I held him a bit longer, a bit closer, than I did yesterday.

Priceless

Librarian: And what is your name?

Julia: Julia Angelique Mckinnis. *pause* But my daddy calls me Goldylocks.

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

A bit of fun

Jacob's interest in all things computer continues. He is now working on his own little videos, and I must say, they are hilarious. Don't ask me why, but I cannot stop laughing as I watch them. Anyway, he would like to upload them onto his blog, so I am experimenting to figure out how. Let's see if this works! So, without further ado, Jacob's first video:

Yay, that worked! Ok, so starting tomorrow (I think) we will be placing Jacob's amazing video creations on his blog. Be there, or be square, baby!

Saturday, March 21, 2009

Stepping gingerly across the ice; is that a cracking sound I hear?

Well, this is it. The recession has officially hit home. Jeremy is now being forced to take an unpaid week off, potentially the first of several this year. Unpaid = smaller paycheck = screwed us. I am beginning to get fearful. I was speaking to my grandmother a few weeks ago about living through the great depression. She and her husband had to survive on his wages working one day a week. I cannot imagine how they did it. And she said they were lucky that he had any work at all. I don't think things will get that bad here, but I'm suddenly thinking very hard about what we would possibly do if Jer lost his job. With no savings and lots of debt, it looks rather bleak. All we can do is pray that it won't come to that and that we will make it through to better days ahead. I am especially trying hard not to be resentful of those around me who are not feeling the pinch of these times at all. I know that we have a lot to be thankful for, that there are many who are much worse off than us. It's just a wee bit hard to see some people spending and vacationing, etc. etc. as though they have not a care in the world. Ah well, we just have to tighten those belts a bit further, I guess. Hopefully we won't run out of holes.

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Well, other than our underpants, of course...

Wow, you know, as far as wells go, mine has been as dry as a bone for a very long time. I just sit down, click that little "new post" button, and stare at an empty white reflection of my brain. Nothing. I just have nothing interesting to talk about. I am at this point where I don't want to complain about things, cause I'm frankly sick of whiney people. Neither do I want to preach, cause I'm totally sick of preachy people. And people who write about how awesomely awesome their families and lives are ya di da di da make me mildly sick to my stomach, so I certainly don't want to do that. And where does this leave me? With nothing at all to talk about. In the immortal words of Toad, "Bleh."

My life is going well, if a tad on the predictable side. Not that I'm complaining, mind you. Tragedy and difficulty are an excitement I can do without, thank you very much. No, I very much like my predictable peaceful existence. Winter is a time of hybernation for me, when my brain kind of holes up inside my head and does its best not to think too much about anything grander than what we will be having for dinner and whether there will be anything distracting on TV tonight. I truly do not like to leave the house in the winter, and consider it a mild miracle that I actually kept up my Monday piano lesson/ library story time date throughout the season. Jeremy brought the boys to their ski lessons, and swimming consists of me rolling up to the door of the Y, watching the boys hop out with their duffle bag and cards in hand, and driving back home again. I don't even have to wear pants if I don't want to (although, rest assured, I do. At least, most of the time...). Other than that, I hardly leave the house at all in the winter. And that's the way, uh huh uh huh, I like it...

But now spring is once again poking it's grubby little nose in my face, and I find myself actually relishing my annual emergence into the sunshine. Nightly walks are back, this year with the addition of an independent Julia sans stroller (which she begins to regret right around the three-quarters point) and a very adorably alert Jade.

Speaking of the girls, the sudden weather change has also brought about some nasty cold bugs, so some prayers would be appreciated. There is something so heart-rending about those sweet little watery eyes and sniffly noses. When she's feeling particularly miserable, Julia has taken to proclaiming in a most pathetically dramatic sigh "It's a hard knock life for me." Oh, my poor, poor baby.

Other than that, nothing else has really changed around here. And for that, I am very, very grateful.